Stepping stone...

There was I time I could smile a genuine smile and all the bad in the world would seem obsolete.

There was a time where a simple smile could right all wrongs. But then that was in a time when black was black and white was white, with no grey areas inbetween. A time where there was a clear definition between right and wrong. That was a long time ago when I was still so naive and whole, now I feel so conflicted so torn. How is it that I am the most content and happiest that I have ever been in my life and at the same time I feel so depleted and tired and just worn out. I am so tired of trying, of being the only one that keeps on pushing and trying. While the world is crying I keep on smiling and comforting. Everyday I wake up and my soul is crying out, my whole being shrinks down trying to find a hole any hole to disapear into until I could become whole again. Yet I pull myself up, I get up and I push on... I put a smile on my weary face and you would never geuss how thin I am really stretched. I go out in the world, and I listen to the cries and I take those blows of frustration. I am all in, heart, mind,body and soul. Willingly being trampled upon to try and right this crooked world. I smile a genuine smile, breaking myself into tiny little pieces. I am so tired yet so composed. Knowing that in the end all I am and ever been in this world, is a stepping stone.